just a dream :)

Monday, March 31, 2008

My Scars{1:55 PM}

This is to the one person who made me feel so together but so broken up inside. (Yes, You Know Who U Are) This is for the person i trusted so much. But all she did was use me, manipulated me and hurt me! I'm Sick of Her. I'm Tired of her treating me like a dog where she can just release everything on and treat like shit. I'm also sick of trying to help her coz she never listens!
But Guess what? You Can Go On and do whatever You Want! But When You Get Hurt! Just Don't Come Running Back To Me! I Ain't Gonna Be Here Anymore! I'm Gonna Move On! Don't Blame Me For Ignoring You.. It's Just All I Can Do Now.. And It's About Time i did something for myself. not always caring bout What u freaking Feel.. coz u've NEVER cared bout me!

Drunk and I'm feeling down
And I just wanna be alone
I'm pissed 'caues you came around
Why don't just go home
'Cause you channel all your pain
And I can't help you fix yourself
You're making me insane
All I can say is

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
And my weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel

I tried to help you once
Against my own advice
I saw you going down
But you never realized
That you're drowning in the water
So I offered you my hand
Compassions in my nature
Tonight is our last stand

I can't help you fix yourself
But at least I could say I tried
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life

I tear my open, I sew myself shut
And my weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel...

These scars that's in me is never going away..
don't u dare think everything will be the same.. coz it's not..
i'm never gonna forgive u for what u've done to me!
I'll never forget too!
Just Get Lost!

Ps: I Hate You..

``Buhbwaii

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

The Beginning . .{11:23 PM}

I can’t waste time so give it a moment
I realize nothings broken
No need to worry about everything I’ve done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don’t look back got a new direction
I loved you once, needed protection
You’re still a part of everything I do
You’re on my heart just like a tattoo
I’ll always have you...

A new Beginning.. A fresh Start..
kinda feels good to finally get my feet back on the ground..
I Used to think letting go and moving on will hurt alot.. but i guess i stand corrected.. It hurt ABIT at first.. then It eventually made me feel much better..

Not saying that i enjoy having these kind of problems in my life.. but sometimes eventhough these problems may cause you to have WHITE HAIRS (Which i ACCIDENTALLY pulled off.=S 10 hairs will grow in it's place? well it's an experiment i'm doing) , but it also makes u stronger.. makes you better than who you were yesterday.. or as some people would put it..it'll make you 'a better man' well in my case it's 'a better WOman'..
I Can't deny the fact that i still miss what i left behind.. but i can't turn back now can i? I've Got a new Direction.. So I Gotta be strong and keep going foward..

SooOOOoo... 2008.. Well...
I'm Happy Everything's turning out great for Serene and I.. Guess 2008 isn't that bad after all eh? Actually I Gotta Thank Serene And Megan! They've always been there to help me (even in the middle of the night) and i really appreciate that.. I Also wanna thank my other buddies who's been there for me along the way.. Thanks for all the encouraging words and advices.. u kinda made me who i am today!I Really Really Thank You Guys! =)

Other Than That, School's also falling in place.. (at least i think it is O_o) haha.. I Gotta work harder and Study harder for the next exam.. Not Much Spare time right now.. busy with bintulu.. think after this competition.. i'm gonna retire from badminton for a while..
Church? Well Kinda been far away from God for a while.. I wanna take time after the competition to patch everything up again..
I wanna be a good example to follow.. not a bad one.. hope people won't simply judge just for the sake of judging.. Like the saying goes.. 'DON'T judge a book by it's cover'.. who knows, i might supprise you..-_^

Life's gonna be different!
That I Can Guarantee.. =)
Thanx for reading..
hope you enjoyed it..
leave a comment..

GOD BLESS YOU
Have a nice day~! ^_^

``Buhbwaii

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Over You..{10:57 PM}

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

I ain't gonna pretend i'm okay.. honestly i'm not really sure what i feel..
But I'll Keep believing that there's something better installed for me..
like a wise friend said..
" In order to see a rainbow, we must first endure some rain. Keep Trusting God and the skies witll begin to clear.. and we need to stop hoping for sunshine and instead see the beauty of rain. If God brings us to it, he'll bring us through it "
Guess i gotta Let It go even if i don't want to. life is not always fair..
i can't always have what i want.. I'm gonna Live each day with a smile on my face and i'm not gonna regret anything!
life's about learning.. guess i gotta learn this too.. =)
I'm Gonna Change.. Things Are Gonna Be Different Now On..
I've Got Great People Backing me up.. i'm gonna get through this!
=)

Ps: I've Got Over You!